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Friday, 13 December 2019

Deleting Facebook

I doubt that this will come as any surprise to many, given my level of engagement on here, but I have decided to close my Facebook account. 

I cannot in all conscience lend my name to a company that disseminates lies to further the aims of the neo-fascist party that the Conservative Party has become. 

If you question the strength of my words, read the manifesto, with it’s promise to criminalise the lifestyle of the Roma people, and the Traveller community,  through new trespassing laws, and it’s determination to place the judiciary under political control. 

I am of Roma descent.  

I respect the independence of the judiciary. 

I will miss checking-in on my friends worldwide, and ‘liking’ pictures of my grandchildren- but this is a stand I must take. 

Let me close my last post with this:

Can a politician lie about Election Day on a Facebook ad?

AOC:
“You announced recently that the official policy of Facebook now allows politicians to pay to spread disinformation. In 2020 election and in the future. So I just want to know how far I can push this in the next year. Under your policy using census data as well, could I pay to target black predominantly zip codes and advertise them the incorrect election date?”

MZ: “I think, probably...”

Watch it here: 


https://www.businessinsider.com/aoc-mark-zuckerberg-video-congress-facebook-questioning-2019-10?r=US&IR=T C:  

Wednesday, 30 October 2019

Stream Of Unconsciousness

Unusually for me, I have been unable to sleep.

I observe this phenomenon with a certain degree of antagonism. I am a gold star sleeper. I believe I inherited this gift from my father, God rest his soul, and it is priceless. Waking at 3 am is not unusual, necessitated by an ageing bladder, but I am usually able fall back into the arms of Morpheus in an instant.

Not this week.

There seems to be no reason for my wakefulness. There are no pressing issues, no anxieties, nothing disturbing my conscience. I know this because night after night, I lay awake interrogating my wakefulness with a grudging curiosity, drawing a blank.

I am a little slow on the uptake, by day four I realised there was a work to do here. Pray.

Of course! My sleep deprivation episodes began immediately following a bible study on the Lord's Prayer, where I retold the story of Penny and the Vacuum Cleaner to explain for sure that I have absolutely no idea what prayer is, or how it, "works".

Penny and I often sat together in what we grandly called, The Prayer Room at the Mission Hall, but was in fact, a tiny space en route to the toilet. Our role was to pray for the Mission workers and our friends who had dropped in for coffee and a snack in a warm and hospitable environment.

Penny prayed with fervour, with deep faith and with profound intent. I said Amen. My contribution, was to vocalise the mystery by praying in tongues, don't ask me to go there, you either believe it, or you don't, let's leave it at that.

Do I 'believe" in Prayer? I do. But I have no ides what I'm believing in. Back to Penny. She became very sick, "I'm praying for a miracle," she told me, and I prayed that she would know what her miracle was before she died. You hear the difference? She died in peace, so I am sure that she did.

I held the notion of a miracle open as an option, I know that amazing healings are possible having received one. I held out real hope for my friend.

So yes, I prayed, and when Penny died, I cried.

Two weeks before Penny's death, I am cleaning the Church Office feeling very virtuous about it, when I hit a snag. The dust canister of the top-of-the-range cordless vacuum cleaner wouldn't budge. 'OK, I said to the Cosmos,I'm here doing a good deed, so show up and fix this thing!"

To be absolutely clear, I am venting frustration, this is not a conscious prayer. Someone calls my name. It's Mary, asking for a key. I look up from the trash can where my struggle with the Dyson was playing out. The guy with her says, "I've got one of those, do you need help with it?'

Look, there are coincidences, and there's this.

You might think I'm grateful. I'm not, I'm furious.

"My friend is dying of cancer, and You fix the bloody vacuum cleaner?! I just don't get it."

I don't. I think that's the point. "Not my will, but Thine be done."

Now that I've worked that out, I expect to sleep soundly tonight. I'll let you know.

 

Tuesday, 15 October 2019

Friday, 4 October 2019

Catch-Up

It's been a while.

The electric blanket went on last night, and I fished out a bed-jacket for in-bed tv watching. These are small steps towards averting climate disaster, ie by delaying the putting on the central heating, that with buying into a refillable washing-up liquid service, reverting to soap, and worrying a bit about flying, fool me into thinking I'm becoming more green.

I joined the Climate Strike a couple of weeks ago, there's a photo. Spot the granny in the middle. Disaster will hit me late, but I doubt I'll outlive it. Outliving it, appears to the plan for most of my generation, I'm ashamed to say.




Last week, I attended the Labour Party Conference. I am pleased to be a member of the Labour Party:I am reluctant to offend you, dear reader, but I cannot fathom for the life of me, how giving yet another tax-cut to very rich people is going to stop very poor people from dying of hunger. Poor people being thrown out on the streets and hungry children eating toilet paper, matters to me. Sorry.




I do my bit. I apologise to the next generation for how inadequate that bit is.

 

 

 

 

 

Tuesday, 27 August 2019

Getting An Education

The Early Years

I started this blog with a sense of regret - that after my father’s death in 2012, there was so much about him that I did not know. So this is, in part, my record for my children and grandchildren.

I open with this, because this blog post is unlikely to be of any interest to anyone else, and I apologise for that. This is pure self-indulgence.

My schooling begins with a miracle. Oh yes, a bona fida one. I had a near-death experience as a four year-old, of which I remember nothing except colour, and light and a sense of well-being. On my return, a brain injury that was supposed to leave me with the faculties of a cabbage, was healed, and something extraordinary happened in the process: I could read. 

No-one knows how, but after three weeks in a coma, I left hospital a fluent reader. The doctors postulated something about the left and right hemispheres of brain working together, but that’s hardly scientific, and as we now know, they do anyway. 

I have one memory that might help. Someone read a Noddy Book to me, and I recall picking it up afterwards and decoding it. Hospital is a boring place. What else is there to do?

My astonished parents walked me round the equally astonished neighbours and had me read from The Times of London. I guess they thought The Daily Mirror was not sufficiently challenging. 

Matson Infants School, which is now a Tesco Express, took this genius into their stride, and put me through the Reading Scheme, just like everyone else: 'Janet and John', 'The Ladybird Readers', 'Through The Rainbow', I remember them all. I recall Miss Greenwood, pointing to the Alphabet Chart, “Aaay sounds Ah. Bee sounds, Buh!’ Each letter having a corresponding picture, some of which i still recall. Miss Greenwood was young and kind. She had forty children, no assistant and taught us ALL to read. Including those of us who already could. Being young, she used modern methods. We sat round tables, we played a lot we painted from jam jars of primary colours,  we modelled with plasticine.

School opened at nine. The building was a Victorian Schoolhouse, the kind I would, forty years later, become headteacher of, but due to the rapid expansion of Matson in a post-war housing boom, it was augmented by three modern temporary classrooms. 

A third of a pint of milk was handed out around 1015, just before Morning Play. There may have been biscuits. 

Mornings were devoted to the serious stuff: reading, writing, arithmetic, Religous Education and Nature Study. Lunch was from noon till one-thirty;this reflects the days when children often walked home for lunch. I had school dinners, which for a working-class child in the fifties, were a vital source of nutrition. Here in the twenty-first century, when we thought back then, that everything would be fixed, it is shameful that they still are.

The dinners were amazing, meat and two veg, followed by PUDDING! Raspberry blancmange with a homemade shortbread biscuit, and Butterscoth Tart were my favourites. 

After lunch we SLEPT! Miss Greenwood would set up miniature canvass camp beds, and we napped until 2:30. The afternoons would comprise PE, music, painting and stories. I recall, with horror, a Grimms Tale we were told called, “The Red Shoes” I was five yeas old, and the impact of this ghastly tale has lasted a life time. 

Mums (always the mums) would collect us at 4pm. 

There are fewer memories of ‘Middle’ and ‘Top’ Infants, as Years 1 and 2 were known in those days. Miss Greenwood’s Class was, ‘Reception’. And still would be. 

Mrs Millard, ‘Tops’ introduced me to a life-long love of poetry, with children’s classics by authors like Charles Causley and John Masefield. I remember a lurid poster of Persephone being dragged by Hades to the Underworld, which scared the life out of me, and was an entirely fitting introduction to Greek Mythology.

BBC Children’s Programming was a feature of my Primary Years. Mrs Millard would have us put our chairs on top of our tables to clear a little space for ‘Let’s Move’ a dance programme that survived for many decades. Later, I would enjoy the Monday Morning ritual of ‘Singing Together’, that lasted long enough for me to use with my own classes in the 1980’s. 

Home Time had rituals of its own. Chairs would go on top of tables again, for the convenience of the cleaner, and the day would close with a prayer. 

Finlay Junior School

Aged seven, I moved up into the Juniors. Even augmented, the old village school couldn’t accommodate ‘juniors’, so my parents had to find a new school. There was a local alternative, Robinswood Primary School, but there was no room for me, so I had to go instead to Finlay Rd Junior School in Tuffley, which was a tuppenny bus ride away. My mum would have taken me at first, I’m sure, but soon, I was making the journey on my own. It was a huge adventure for a seven year old! I’d leave home at about 8;15 am and walk to the bus-stop which we called,’The Terminus’ because it was the end of the line. No-one took any notice of a child travelling alone. I'd ask for  a ticket to ‘Cotteswold Rd’ pay my money, get off the bus about five minutes later, walk down Cotteswold Rd, into Finlay Rd, cross with the Lollipop man, and I there. as I write, I can recall vividly the details of the walk; the thatched cottage atop a bank at the corner of Cotteswold Rd, the almond trees shading the bus stop, the youths going in and out of Central Technical School For Boys. ...

I learned from grown-ups to ALWAYS thank the bus driver.

When I grew older, I realised I could get off a stop later, at Cemetery Rd, on the corner of which was a sweet shop. Lemon drops, peanut brittle, gob-stoppers... . I always had money for sweets. 

A huge advantage of Finlay Rd, was the short walk to Selwyn Rd, where, incidentally, I was born, for dinner with my Auntie Mary, who spoiled me rotten. 

Occasionally I would stay for school dinners which were one shilling a day, five bob a week. 

The curriculum at the Juniors was as traditional and unvaried as the Infants, with the introduction of the dreaded, “needlework’. I could sew, quite well, but a pair of pink woollen mittens started in 1958, remain unfinished. I learned I was brilliant at English, but hopeless at arithmetic (still am) loved Nature Study, enjoyed music and art, and could tolerate team games. 

The school day started with Scripture, followed by a religious assembly, where I learned  the magnificent old hymns, and ended with a prayer. All this God encultured us, an entirely white population, all baptised and nominally affiliated to The Church of England. The local vicar's daughter was in my class. For those of you familiar with the area, I was in the top class (4A1) when the new St Aldate's Church was being built. I watched that 'hyperbolic parabolic' roof take shape. Those were two of the my favourite words at the time. Exotic in their inaccessibility. 

There was no school uniform, which was a pity for we working-class girls, because your status was immediately apparent in the number of stiff net petticoats you wore under your dress. I owned one. I have to say that such differences never impacted on me much: I loved school, apart from arithmetic,that is, and not making the choir, and I accepted that one petticoat was all I was going to get, so that was that. 

The cane was available to my teachers, but I only remember it being used once. Discipline, in classes of over forty, was strictly maintained, but not oppressive. 

The teaches were kindly, the wonderful headmaster, Mr Langston universally liked and respected. I was in Day House, though not a great accumulator of House Points. I rarely got chosen first for teams, which were always headed up by boys. Neither issue bothered me. 'Encultured', you see. That was just how it was.

In 1962, I passed the 11+ by some bloody miracle, because in those days, you had to do long division, and I stil can’t. 

Let me rage a moment about the pass rates for Grammar Schools. In 1962 over 50 children from Finlay Rd Junior School ‘passed’ for Grammar School. These days, thanks to the end of zoning, virtually all of those places now go to middle-class children, coached by tutors,  who are bussed in from as far as Swindon, forty miles away. This is the only justification needed to get rid of these elitist schools, whose one  purpose - to give a decent education to working-class children - is now at an end. Rant over.

Grammar School

Don’t get me wrong, I loved school, but Ribston Hall Grammar School was a 'fixed' system. If you were the daughter of a doctor or a lawyer, you were in the A and B streams to be  prepped for University. If your father was a postman, as mine was in 1962, you were in the C Stream and you did Domestic Science. You were 'educated' to be an efficient secretary or a nurse. (Both worthwhile careers, but you get my point.)

I got promoted to the B’s in my 4th year, because I excelled at the sciences. Not only the Domestic ones, obviously. 

I had fun. I am a lazy student, I did the least possible to get by. This, I rate as a sign of intelligence, I had a life, I was happy. 

The 4th year brought boys into my life, but that’s another story. Needless to say, school dropped even farther down my list of priorities. 

Despite the distractions, I secured sufficient GCE’s to obtain a place at a Teacher Training College. University was never offered to me as an option, and in fact, because of my class, I was openly dissuaded by the dreadful Hilda Mortimer from going there. 

I made it. 

Bingley College Of Education

Thanks to the direct intervention of the Dreadful Hilda, I did not get to Rolle College in Exmouth  (Mort’s old stomping ground.) I was the only Ribston pupil ever, NOT to do so. I was offered instead my second choice: Bingley College of Education, a scion of The University of Leeds, and one of the oldest Teacher Trainig Colleges in the country. 

Look, I have to be honest here, my student days were not my most glorious.  I enjoyed two of my courses, “American Studies” and “Lettering And Design”, the rest was poorly taught, and I, in retaliation,  poorly learned. So academically, I scraped through with the assistance of the Dean, who helped me to cope with the pressure of turning in meaningless work in areas of study that were facile and seemed incomprehensably irrelevant. 

Looking back, I see the problem quite clearly, The College had suffered a massive influx of students in the late sixties drive to increase teacher numbers. It coped as well as it could. The year before I arrived it had weathered a student strike, and the aftermath, in terms of curriculum reform, was not appealing. There was a lack of intellectual rigour, there was little debate, or any attempt to engage the students in the subject matter. Intellectually, it was far less demanding than A Levels at school. I was puzzled, disappointed and disengaged. I nearly dropped out. 

The absolute low-point was my final teaching practice where I was abandoned in a school in an area of high-deprivation, given a class with absolutely no professional support, and left to sink or swim. I swam. I came from such an estate myself, and, for all our sakes, I needed to prove that WE could succeed. I was visited twice by some twat from the art department at college who didn’t know me, didn't give a toss, and on absolutely no evidence, awarded a me a C, when even surviving the ten weeks intact, should have got me an A. Bastard.

My Magnum Opus, for a  meaningless course entitled, “World Problems” was, inexplicably, a project on the ferns in Princes’ Park, adjacent to the College. Nobody noticed, or cared, that it was a piece of fiction cobbled together from a few visits to count fern species and ‘The Observer  Book of Ferns’. My ‘co-author’ Mandy, with my grudging acquiescence, contributed absolutely nothing. So I cheated TWO of us through college, my greatest and most lasting academic achievement of being there. I see it as the ultimate revenge.

Paradoxically, the years at Bingley College were also some of my most formative and happiest, though, obviously, I was more of an incipient drop-out, than a academic star. I had some wonderful times, and more importantly, I met some wonderful people.

There were my lovely fresher year roommates:five of them. (Student  teacher numbers led to high-density accommodation!) at Wingfield House in the town. Clockwise round 'The Room At The Top', *there was me, then Tina, who had the bed next to the window overlooking the croquet lawn, then Carolyn. Next to the door, slept my dear friend, Viv, who still puts up with me to this day, and under the eaves, (and a poster of Terence Stamp) Claire hung out. We all studied different main subjects, so rarely interacted in College, but, my a second miracle, we managed a whole year with no fights, a certain amount of boyfriend sharing, and a LOT of laughs. 

Through the intermediacy of Viv and her fiancĂ© Brian, via the boyfriend sharing and Tina’s generosity, I met Raymond who, in 1971, became my husband. And still is!

We had a typical student courtship, what with it being the sixties and all  - though the Pennines did get in the way during the week. 

I left Bingley College with three precious things, an abiding love of Yorkshire, a teaching qualification, and two wonderful relationships that have stood the test, and the tests, of time.

Dr Madeline Hunter

OK, it’s pretty clear that I have very little respect for the preparation I was given to prepare to teach. I needed to self-educate. I studied more widely: Piaget, Steiner, Feinstein, I muddled along. I survived by pretty much copying what everyone else was doing.

I have paid insufficient attention to the highlight of the Bingley course that proved, in hindsight, the most useful. American Studies. 

I went to Bingley to study Education and History. When I got there, I was offered the chance to change my major, so I switched to American Studies.

 I was curious. My father, in every other way a reasonable man, would have no truck with Americans. This was odd, because I’ll wager he’d never met any. I never did get to the bottom of it, but I think it may have had something to do with Brits competing with GI’s for girlfriends during the war. It was, to my mind, irrational. So I decided to study the history, literature and politics of the United States of America. I still do. Today, it makes me a star on Twitter.

 In the course of the course, there was a six week teaching placement at Menwith Hill Army Base near Harrogate. For the first time in my life, aged twenty, I met Americans. I fell in love. 

Ann Bamburger, my Master Teacher, took me under her wing, and instructed me in the craft of teaching. Without her as a model, I would have been completely at sea when abandoned in Halifax the following year. I was immersed in the culture of the state of Maryland, and I revelled in it.

So, when, in 1976, I saw an advertisement in the Times Education Supplement, for the Fulbright Teacher Exchange Program. I persuaded Ray that this would be a great idea, and we went for it. We were both accepted, and eventually posted to the incomparably beautiful Washington State 

Our school districts (Bellevue and Mercer Island ) were exceptionally hospitable, our schools welcoming. We were both offered the opportunity to undertake Dr Madeline Hunter's, ‘Instructional Theory Into Practice’ A 'how-to’ of pedagogy that tooled me up for the rest of my career, and spurred me on to .... Join the Open University.

The Open University. 

Up until now, my education had been entirely free (or more accurately, paid for post-hoc, through my taxes.) Now I was funding myself. I began slowly. My Grammar School experience had left me with pretty low expectations of what I could achieve, and I began with a Course Cettificate in 'Remedial Education' Studying with the OU is a bug. I still have it. Once I started, I couldn’t stop, though were pauses for more important things, like, having children. (Hi girls!)

In 1979, I enrolled for a degree, for which my Certificate in Education and that first course, gave me credit. Given my maths skills, I started in a scary place, The Foundation Course in Science. I loved it! I gave birth during it! I passed it. 

From there on in, I honed my professional skills. In 1985, I graduated with a BA. A couple of years later I achieved an Advanced Diplome in Educational Management. In 1996 I achieved my Masters in Educational Management. 

Before I started at Bingley College I was given a reading list. On that list was, ‘The Village School’ by Miss Read.Harking back to the Lovely Mrs Aldridge at Matson Infants, I thought, “That’s what I want to be! The headteacher of a Village School!” Twenty-three years ago, I made it. Ten years ago I retired. 

Still Learning

The pace has slowed down a lot, but I’m still going.

I registered with EdX and have participated in three of their courses: The Science of Happiness, ‘Natural History Drawing’ and ‘Storytelling For Social Change’ 

And that’s what I’m doing now. Telling my story. If you stayed with me to the end.:Thank you! 









Saturday, 3 August 2019

Valley of The Shadow of Death

Have I told you that one of my favourite occupations, as one curious about the numinous, is to scour YouTube for Near Death Experiences? If you are familiar with this pastime of mine, and the subject holds no interest for you, skip to the story at the end of this piece.  Meanwhile ... .

I don't know about you, but I hold no fear of death. I put this down to two things: One, I came close to it as a child, and found it quite a pleasant experience.  Two, a rather humorous second-hand encounter with the Grim Reaper, via a short story by Damon Runyon, written, I presume, shortly before he dies in 1946.

Runyon's stories are better than a day at the races, which feature largely in his repertoire, along with Prohibition era bad guys and their molls, way back when a gal might not mind being called a moll. I devoured them in my teens, and now, with a greater knowledge of what was what, there, then, I enjoy them even more. Looking back, I suspect the romance of the speakeasy may have been what drew me to undertake American Studies at College, though I subsequently found New York not to my  liking at all. 

I am much influenced by what I read in my teens. In 1969, I discovered the stories of Miss Read, and dreamed a very different romance: that of becoming the headteacher of a Village School, which, in 1996, I managed to achieve. That the job I picked at eighteen  should fall into my lap in my forties, is evidence enough for me that, sometimes, the universe delivers. 

I am straying, as ever, far from my intent, which is to come to terms with the very serious illness of a friend of mine, Penny. 

First, she was unwell. Something vague  and intestinal, and a weariness that would not lift. Then it was the treadmill: Doctor. Hospital. Tests. Hopeful Diagnosis. Exploratory Operation. Hopeless Diagnosis... . Here we are then, I have reached the point of this. Doing what we often do with death, avoid it until it simply won't go away. 

Penny and I served at Gloucester City Mission together, often in the Prayer Room. We were very different pray-ears. Penny was firm with God, and fervent, I, somewhat more tentative. I have studied the sacred texts and see where we're both coming from: "Ask  and it shall be given to you," Penny says. I nod. I don't think I've quite got this asking right. I'm more of the, "Suck it and see," school of prayer. The Holy One already has it sorted, let's see how it unfolds, kind of thing. I DO ask, but tend to lose interest in the outcome. 

I am unsettled because Penny has us all praying for a miracle. You see where this is going? 

I want to take her by the hand and reassure her. Penny, I will walk with you through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, there is nothing to fear. 

Who's right? Am I defeatist? Or am I seeing with a greater clarity,  that the miracle is to have lived life as a conscious entity in an incomprehensibly awesome cosmos, until our fragile bodies can no longer carry us? 

Today, I will light a candle,  and keep it burning, for Penny.

For her miracle. 

(Here's that Runyon Story I wrote of. To lighten the mood. )


Monday, 1 July 2019

Expanding My Consciousness

Yesterday evening I did something to my back that did something to my leg, that meant I couldn't move my right leg without pain, so I am taking a day off to rummage through the esoteric edges of YouTube to further the cause of my personal enlightenment.

 

It's 10:53 and my right leg is considerably better, which I put down to my last-ditch prayer, "Jesus, help me!" It's my thing. I don't use it too often, I really do like to make it on my own, and I don't like to keep asking. This is crap theology, by the way, the Divine One, however you choose to name them, is boundless in love and generosity.

 

I love it ALL! Near Death Experiences, Jesus was a Yogi, The Aliens Are Already Here, The Turin Shroud. I've immersed myself in every conspiracy theory and wild hope you can imagine.

 

Am I changed? In that I have my own way of defining reality, my own wild hope, no. I am healthily sceptical of even my own beliefs.

 

This is my conclusion. The Being within whom, " We live and move and have our being.." Is incredibly relaxed about our own mind-creations, in a sense they are 'his' too. It's not what you believe that brings enlightenment, but the extent to which you care. Sometimes, I care a lot. Some days I just say, "Sod it!" And stay in bed.

 

Everything belongs.

 

:)

 

 

Monday, 3 June 2019

Socialism For Dummies



I know from experience that trying to explain socialism to people who are  convinced by some means or other, that the current world order is the only way to go, will not be swayed by me, so save yourself an apoplectic fit, and skip this post.

I was born in 1950. I survived childhood illnesses, and a brain injury, because of that  great socialist achievement in the U.K: the National Healtn Service, paid for by the contributions of  every working adult through National Insurance. I had a decent home to live in, at a rent my parents could afford, because of  a massive post-war housing programme, initiated by a Labour Government. I was educated for free to University level, thanks to the socialist principle that education is a right, not a privilege, so, yeah, I'm a socialist,  because if nobody had been,  I wouldn't be here. Reason enough?

Sometimes I am asked to defend Communism, being called to account for Stalin's purges. I am easy with that, because calling a Socialist,  a Stalinist, is like equating a mild-mannered member of the Conservative Party with a member of the SS in Nazi Germany. I could do it at a push, but there would be no truth to it.

I could list those things that are anathema to we socialists, who are internationalists by default: empire-building, war-mongering , asset-stripping, despotic regimes. vulture capitalism, environmental destruction and climate-change- denial ... and that's just a beginning. These  are problems that free-market capitalism and neoliberal dogma will exacerbate not solve. But here's a guy who can better explain why socialism will save a world that is otherwise hurtling towards destruction. Take a bow, Jeremy Corbyn:





Sunday, 2 June 2019

The Eagle and the Butterfly

I am amazingly blessed with my friends, and grateful for the wisdom, joy and opportunities to get ever-so-slightly-drunk together from time to time. Thank you all. 

For the last few weeks I have been staying with Darlene and Steve in Redmond, Washington, chilling out. I lay down all my responsibilities and give myself the luxury of time to think. It is a gift offered to me by my lovely family who will manage very well without me, and the Pollards who welcome me as part of their newly-enlarged clan. 

I lie on a hammock in the shade under a tree full of tiny birds, next to a stream in a ravine, and I pull  myself fully into the presence of God. I am, in my imagination, the noise of the stream, the flight of the tiny birds, the swaying branches of the towering conifers, and I am overwhelmed with joy. 

This is the prayer of the mystics, inhabiting  the space between now and eternity, where I explore the mind of God and shelter in his love.

It is bliss to soar with the eagle drifting upwards in the thermals above Lake Sammamish, and simultaneously float from lily to lily with a swallowtail butterfly busily testing the air for a food plant for it’s young and a welcoming flower to refuel before vanishing from sight.

When I return to England, I will take this moment with me, living the joy of being fully present to the Presence, that is a Holy Communion for everyone. 







Thursday, 4 April 2019

NaPoWriMo Day 4: Dying Of Duty

 

Sarah Morley


I am eight. I have not known death
Or childbirth.
Imperial brides, stoic women wedded to the Civil Service, are
Beyond my imagining.
"Bombay" rolled over my tongue, wreathed in mystery.
Arrested by pathos, drawn in by the pillar of cloud
Entranced by the nearness of God in the presence of his angels,
I came face to face with mortality.
"How can it be," I wondered, then, and now,
A woman could embark on a sea voyage
Close to her time, and die of doing her duty.
 
 
 

 

Wednesday, 3 April 2019

The Cherry Tree NaPoWriMo Day Three

In the beginning,

Yesterday,

The sun gazed somewhat magnificently, from a bright blue sky, and

My gaze fixed tightly on the cherry tree in the garden next door.

I am certain, as I gaze in wonder, that the day is perfect.

There have been warmer days. Oh yes. On those, I would not leave the coolcave

That is the thick inner room of my English cottage, until the sun had passed over.

There have been days in more exotic places. Forgive me.

If I am, right now, standing besides a cascade in a rain forest, near Oahu

Or leaning over the Tsitsa Falls, near Mtata, with my Xhosa friends.

I am moving now to the school house in Talkeetna, Alaska, listening to the

Shrill Klaxon of the lumber train, from the security of the town library.

Oh yes, I have other lives to bring, and have lived them in superb gratitude.

But yesterday, I spoke God's language, on a frighteningly warm March Day when the sun shone brazenly from a bright sky.

And in that moment, the cherry tree was perfection, and my Self rose, delighted, in thanksgiving.

Tuesday, 2 April 2019

Sort of Sonnet

OK, Look. This was As Far As I Got: ... Sorry.

Appear
Embark
Shakespeare
Plutarch

Bemused
Imposed
Refused
Disposed

Berate
Pursue
I'll-fate
Undo

Defied
Died

23:15 on Day Two of the, 'Poem A Day' challenge. And I got desperate ...










Monday, 1 April 2019

First You Take A ...

First you take a twinkle in God's eye.

I don't know, perhaps being the Only One was

Too lonely, even for a Deity. So ...

In an explosion of imagination, it all kicked off.

 

Did She have to think about , for, like,

Eons? Imagining the juxtaposition of quarks

The spin of electrons and

The mass of a boson?

I doubt it.

I'm alert to the possibility that

God thought, one day, of Me.

"Now THERE'S a thing!" He pondered, "Let's do this!"

And out it came!

The firmament -

The waters above and below -

Stars, bears, whales and flowers -

(I am especially fond of flowers)

!

I don't expect that God had to gather, chop and stir

I'm Old School. I think They said,

"Let there be Light,"

And there was light.

And at the end of it all,

There

Was

Me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday, 30 March 2019

Wednesday, 13 March 2019

Lenten Observance

I'm not very good at the formalities of religion. If something doesn't draw me closer to God, or remind me of my need to love my neighbour, I tend to lose interest and wander off. Nevertheless, doing something for Lent has always been part of my discipleship.

 

Giving up chocolate or alcohol, both of which I'm not particularly addicted to, and wouldn't particularly mourn the loss off, never worked, because immediately on making the resolution to abstain, I become obsessed with eating chocolate and drinking alcohol. That ancient serpent, having landed on a great ploy around Day 9, and having no reason to change tack, hisses, "Did God say... ?" and within days, I'm toast.

 

I once declared to anyone willing to listen, "This year, I'm giving up being unkind to people!" This was a conversation stopper for sure. People who are familiar only with my angelic public persona, would gasp in amazement, and fall over themselves to say that they didn't believe that anyone as radiant as I am, could ever be unkind! Very flattering, Just follow me on Twitter, would be my reply these days. @meffrancis if you're interested.

 

To be fair to myself, I wasn't expecting too many instances of unkindness to deal with, but what a revelation! Choking back a sarcastic comeback, holding fire on the irritable retort, and repressing the urge to roll my eyes happened far my often that I anticipated. I ended Lent that year with a humbling uptick in self-awareness.

 

Finally, I gave up giving up stuff for Lent, and this works a treat. That would be the same year that my Resolution was to never have a never self-defeating and totally pointless Resolution. The only one I've ever kept beyond January 8th.

 

I've started Taking Things Up for Lent instead. A daily conscious prayer routine, weekly Catechesis, and Priority Number One: eliminating waste.

 

I recommend eliminating waste as a spiritual practice for several reasons. Firstly, it induces a warm-glow of virtue, secondly, it enables a ceaseless examination of conscience, and thirdly, it saves you money. Win-win-win.

 

Every light gets turned off. Radiators in unused rooms are switched to 'frost' my 1970's "Left Over For Tomorrow" cook book has been dusted off ... Everything I do has come under scrutiny, and this, I think, is pretty much what Lent is about.

 

 

 

 

 


Tuesday, 5 March 2019

A Very Funny Thing Happened ...

Hello! I'm back ...

You may have noticed, "Posted With Blogsy" at the end of my posts, and this is because I use this amazing app to write my blogs. It is totally compatible with my iPad (Paddy) which I find Blogger isn't, or anyway, not so much. This is sounding like an advertisement, isn't it? It's not, because more than a year ago the developers of Blogsy stopped updating it, and it is no longer available.

This was not so terrible. OK, I couldn't do the things I never did, like add video clips, but I could do THIS, until this creaky old iPad upped and died.

I first noticed, last December, it wasn't powering up properly, and that the on/off button wasn't offing. Within days, it stopped recharging, and I knew the game was up. I bought it secondhand, and it had served a respectable term so, after trying for a couple of days to just make sure Paddy was dead, I laid her to one side and got on with my life. Sadly, without blogging: having lost the means to do so quickly and conveniently, and having much else to do, I went quiet.

Two days ago, I decided that a respectable mourning period had passed, and the time had come to lay Paddy to rest at the great recycling centre in the city. Having a bit of a joke with my husband Ray. I said, " I believe in miracles. Before I chuck it, I'll pray over it!"

It's true, I do, believe in miracles, but to be honest, I let the Lord off the hook on this one, because I was just having a laugh. I even told Him so and asked for his indulgence.

I promise you, I hadn't given up on Paddy without a fight. I had changed recharging cables, I'd left her charging for twenty-four hours. Not a spark, not a flash, not even the faintest glimmer of an apple.

So after a throw-away ask of the Almighty, I plugged this iPad in, and let it be. Some hours later, I flipped open the case, and to my utter astonishment ... Here we are.

Of course there are all kinds of explanations, but the one I prefer is this : the Lord of All has a great sense of humour, and always has the last laugh.

Sunday, 6 January 2019

The Chimney-Sweep And The Pig

As part of my New Year Makeover, I'm going to devote more time to one of my passions: story-telling. 

So there! It's out, and I have  done something about it!  I've enrolled in a course: "Storytelling For Social Change."  It's available from the University of Michigan, for free, on the EdX platform. 

Storytelling For Social Change

"I Daniel Blake' a BAFTA-winning film about the use of  'social murder'  * as state policy, aired on the BBC last night, so this course couldn't be more timely.  This amazing exemplar of it's genre has been dismissed as, "A work of fiction by a socialist director .. " by every right-wing politician with a Twitter account. Laughable. As if they'd never wept through,"Schindler's List"! 

Here's my first, 'Assignment' "To tell a story from your own experience in 250 words or less ..." 

The Tale of The Chimney-Sweep And The Pig

My Dad was a Special Constable. (Community Police Volunteer) This is way back in the 1960's and I am ten. Even the regular policemen ride bicycles to patrol the estate where I lived, it was THAT long ago.


This particular Saturday, my dad was called to Farmer Peacey's pig sty. One of his pigs was missing. It was not going to be too difficult to apprehend the villain, because he'd left his spectacle case behind - I imagine it had dropped out of the thief's pocket in the tussle with the pig. 

So Dad and Fred walk up to the Green's house -the one on the corner of Beacon Road.

Yards away, you can hear that pig squeal, and it was, by all accounts leading the Greens a merry dance.

Fred knocks on the door. Something of a hush falls on the place. Fred knocks again. 
Slowly the door opens and a small frightened face peers, wide-eyed, through the smallest gap. 

"You'd better  let us in, Betty." My dad says, not unkindly. 

Betty nods, and opens the door to reveal a scene of the utmost carnage. Mr Green was a competent chimney sweep, but a pig-sticker, he was not. The drab hallway was festooned with high arcs of rapidly drying blood. As was a flustered Mr Green.

Dad holds out the glasses case, and hands it over. 

"Lionel," he says, "That'd better be the remains of a pig lying on your kitchen table, or you're in real trouble ... " 

There will be more. I'll keep you posted. 

*
Austerity is, 'social murder'