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Thursday, 27 February 2014

Keeping An Eye On Talkeetna

July 2007. A wild and wonderful adventure in a Camper Van around and about Alaska. This trip comes close to belly dancing across the Sinai with a camel, in terms of memorability, and I bring it up AGAIN because it's February, I'm cold, and I'm in need of distraction. 

Being in need of distraction, I thought I'd take another look at the Talkeetna Historical Society's website, and low and behold, I am mining gold.

OK, we have The Onion Fayre, and this is special because, well, it's spelled with a 'y' for a start! What we DON'T have yet, is any activity involving the random placement of animal excreta. I have heard of Donkey Dropping versions of poo-roulette, but the Talkeetna Moose Dropping Festival aces that by miles. Convinced that no moose are  harmed in the pursuit of this brand of do-doo hilarity, I am happy to acquaint you with it's ins and outs.

Firstly, volunteers scour the surrounding bits of Eco-system for moose pellets. These are collected by the bucket full and  each individual presentation alloted a number.

Next up, these numbers are sold on to punters. They are then, thirdly, (pellets, not punters) taken aloft in an air balloon and dropped over the local baseball field. The final drama is the discernment of the winning turd, which must land near some vital piece of a baseball diamond, the name and purpose of which escapes me, not being a fan. 

Winner takes all. 

I can imagine how much fun this is. 

Whilst laughing like a drain over this simple rural past-time, my eye caught a more recent Moose Dropping Festival Event: The Mountain Mother Competition. Sort of convinced, the MMC may add a little more  fun-provoking mileage, I read on:

"A Mountain Mother contest was added to the Moose Dropping festivities in 1991. The only requirement was that the contestant had to be a mom...married or not. Starting with a "baby" in a backpack, feats included: walk a log in hip waders, carrying two buckets of water;"shoot" a balloon moose with a bow and arrow; "catch" a fish; chop up firewood; change the baby and wash out the diaper; make a "pie" and call in the kids. Winners get useful things, like an appointment at the local beauty shop for a haircut, manicure, and massage; a nice dinner out, and gift certificates from the local shops."

Speechless, and overcome by it all, I do recommend you visit, at least virtually, and find out about it for yourself:

http://www.talkeetnachamber.org/schedule/calendar/events-calendar

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